Its all bullshit

Its all fucking shit it's shit shit shit shit shit bollocky fucking shity fuck.
It's all fucking bullshit. nobody knows, nobody feels it, nobody gets told no sorry you can't do that & how many times do I have to hear those words?, how many times I have to just deal with it?, just move on? how many people say those words and not realise its another long line of can't do's and say it like it's no big deal!!!!!!! well it is a big deal a very large big fucking deal. Nobody knows how draining every fucking day can be. I shall just live 50% of my life because of this shity fucking illness that stops me, believe it or not, it's not just me and my seizures being the problem. It's other people, that just immediately say no or you can't do that as soon as they hear the magic word EPILEPSY. It's like poison as soon as it's said! It's not fucking rabbis!!!! I live with this every fucking day and today was just one too many "you can't do that"
Complete fucking bullshit.
Cried a lot and now I'm going to have a crisp sandwich and have some time to wollow in self pity for about half an hour. Then I will just move on......as always.

My Wise Words for 2015......

Just chuck it in the
FUCK IT BUCKET
And move on............
:-D


If you have any wiseness feel free to add! :-D

So what is 2015 gonna bring!!?

Things are still hard!! Maybe even harder And now we know why.

Scan results just before crimbo revealed that I now have a considerable amount of scar tissue on my brain. Scar tissue caused by the radiotherapy I had back in feb 2012. Apparently the scaring can continue to grow 3-5years post treatment!!! (very common) WTF Seriously! We were never told about this, no info on what happens after a year! 

This is why I'm struggling more cognitively and with the long term side effects of the radiotherapy!!! 

2015 Jane Shann mushy pea brain (stage 2) age 36

Takes me so fucking long to do everything :-( I feel so knackered and useless! Fuck it!!!

SO shattered my eyelids r barely open!

I'm soooo fucking shattered all the time! It's really pissing me off now.
I would often have stages of fatigue and stages of energy each lasting a few weeks at a time.
But I have been in this state of fatigue for months now :-( some days not even having the mental energy to type an email or text.
All part of long term side effects of radiotherapy I spose!

STILL NO FUCKING HAIR it ain't gonna grow back now! (radiotherapy Feb 2012)

Some days I just feel like a useless scabby arse hole. This week is one of those days.

Also coming up to 6yrs (Dec 8th) I start thinking about it all at the this time of the year! But I just get on with it.

Thinking of you all....

Thinking of everyone who suffers!!
Suffers pain, whether it be in their body, heart or mind.
It's there with you every moment of every day. Some of us "get it" others not a clue!
Sending a thought to you all x

Just realised....

I haven't made a post since Oct 2013! WTF!! didn't realise it had been soooo long
Hey there my lovelies

HAPPY NEW YEAR (we hope)
The year to be happy
The year to be strong
The year to be loved
The year not to go wrong

Twat in a Hat (part 1)

Hair......Still the fucking same

Radiotherapy february 2012
These photo's March 2014
I think for sure this is now my permanent hair :-( ......mother fuckers